The thing about getting dressed that I have always loved is the finished result. Getting dressed is what I imagine to be like creating a piece of art. You have to ensure you have the materials necessary to create this vision that you have and in hopes that it’ll evoke the emotion that is hopefully positive. So many artists never allow people to see various finished works of art because they don’t feel the emotion behind it that they imagined. They don’t deem it worthy. It can feel shameful.
I can’t even begin to tell you how many times I’ve dressed entirely only to take it off and start all over again. Most that know me know that I take forever to get dressed. I never really understood what it is about me that causes me to take so long to get ready. I had to ask myself am I that much of a procrastinator (oh yeah, I can be sometimes)? I’ve felt like I was weird for so long because why do I care so much about the 'clothes’ that I’m wearing? Over time I have realized that this world is so hurtful at times and I needed armor — psychologically, to face this world. Life has not always been kind to me. I have experienced so much pain and I needed to at least start off on the right path every day, even if I didn’t end up staying there. I would pick myself up every day and try again. For me, that was getting dressed to the best of my ability. Which means, there is a lot of thought that goes into it. It’s very personal, it's deep for because, it’s more than just clothes, it’s my ‘shield’. I decided a long time ago that no matter what I was going through, I wasn’t going to let the world know I felt like shit. I was going to subscribe to the cliche ‘fake it until you make it’. I’m not sure if I have made it yet, however, I’ve come very far. I’m happy. No, you don’t get it, I’m BLOODY happy! And for me, these are reasons to put on my best and face the world.